No fueron más que unos segundos, pero se hicieron eternos. ¿Por qué demonios tardaba tanto? Era muy fácil, solo tenía que poner sí o no. Había pensado aquellas palabras durante días, las había construido en su cabeza una y otra vez, más de cien, más de mil. Gastó varias horas de su vida planeando la pregunta y fantaseando con la respuesta. Le temblaron los dedos al escribir, releyó el mensaje, lo reescribió cuatro o cinco veces y tardó más de un minuto en dar al botón de enviar. Cuando al fin lo hizo no podía despegar sus ojos de la pantalla. Un segundo, el mensaje había llegado. Dos segundos, pudo ver el indicador de lectura… una eternidad ¿por qué no contestaba? Tres segundos, el corazón estaba a punto de estallarle dentro. Llevaba cuatro segundos y decidió cerrar la aplicación. Cinco segundos cuando el pulgar se acercaba a la equis, entonces apareció el mensaje y el tiempo se paró para siempre.
It wasn´t more than any seconds, but they were eternals. Why damn it was so late? It was very easy. He only to write yes or no. He had thought these words during days, He had built in his mind time after time, more than hundreds, more than thousands. He spent some hours of his life thinking a question and daydreaming with the answer. His finger shiver while he wrote, he re-read the message , re-write four or five times and took more than one minute to push the key sending. When he finally done it he couldn´t remove his eyes from screen. On second, the message had arrived. Two seconds, he could see the lecture´s sing… an eternity Why he doesn´t answer. Three seconds, the heart was about to burst inside. He had been four seconds and decided to close the app. Five seconds when the thumb move equis closer, then the message arrived and time stoped forever.
I am where I have always been and, maybe you have got used to me. You no longer notice my absence and my presence. I do not know if it is necessary for you.
I try to be and stay, to grab your attention within your routines, to fill a space that we no longer live.
I feel useless.
However, the miracle happens when the screen lights up and your words appear. Then, the life is recreated again
Apenas iluminada por la luz de la escalera y sin más compañero que su osito, jugaba como si no pasara nada. Vivía feliz su niñez. El papel pintado de su habitación, las canciones y los cuentos le hacían creer que su mundo era el mejor. Nada podía salir mal, porque el mal era un concepto que no existía para él.
Su madre le cogió en brazos y con un beso de esos que solo una madre puede dar le susurró al oído -Vamos, es hora de tu baño.-
Afuera, al otro lado de la calle, el ir y venir de coches era el habitual a esa hora. Juan los miraba mientras apuraba su lata de cerveza de medio litro. Tenía frío. Ojalá pudiera darse un baño caliente
Scarcely illuminated for the upstairs light and without more company than his teddy bear, He played as if nothing happened. He lived his childhood happily. His room´s wallpaper, the songs and the stories made him believe that his world was the best. Nothing could go wrong, because the wrong was a concept which didn´t exist for him.
His mother took him in her arms and with a kiss one of these only a mother can give the whisper to the ear – come on, it´s your bath time.-
Outside, at the other side of the street, the going and coming of cars were normal at that hour. Juan saw them while he drank his half litre beer can. He was cold. He hoped to give himself a hot bath.
Cada uno entró a su hora. La sala, que instantes antes, adolecía de un vacío atronador, se llenó, en pocos minutos, con lo vivido por cada uno.
Volvíamos a encontrarnos después de largo tiempo caminando por rutas distintas, por tierras lejanas, por campiñas verdes y ahogados desiertos. Nuestros ojos reflejaban los rostros con los que nos habíamos cruzado. Cada corazón venía arañado por dolores y signos de batalla. Las manos, gastadas. Los pies, resecos. Sonreímos al vernos.
Éramos héroes, o artistas, o santos. Éramos locos dispuestos a seguir caminando.
Everyone went into at his time. The room, that instants before, it suffered thunderous silence, it got full, in a little minutes, with what lived for each one.
We come back to meet us after long time ago walking for differents paths, by far lands, green countrysides and drowned desert. Our eyes reflected the faces which had crossed with us. Every heart came scraped for hurts and battle signals. The hands, worn-out. The feet, arid. We smile when we see ourselves.
We were heroes, or artists, or saints. We were handy crazies to keep walking.
No me reconozco. Me tenía en gran estima pero últimamente me da lástima mi rostro frente al espejo, cada mañana. No veo lo que quiero ver. Veo lo que detesto. Una imagen, una careta, una excusa bajo la que cobijarme; una sonrisa falsa que se come el mundo mientras el corazón, más abajo, es devorado por los gusanos de la soberbia y la envidia.
Necesito que me mires con tus ojos, porque me quieres, pese a todo. Necesito que me sane tu mirada, que me cures con esas pupilas tuyas que convierten en bien todo mal.
Mírame. Mírame y devuélveme la vida.
I don´t recognise me. I had a good esteem of mine but lately my face hurts me in front of the mirror, every morning. I don´t see which I want to see. I see which I hate it. An image, a mask, an excuse under which to shelter; a false smile which is eating the world while the heart, below, it is devoured by pride and envy worms.
I need that you see me with your eyes, because you love me, despite everything. I need that your look cure me, that you cure me with your pupils which transform in good every wrong.
Look at me. Look at me and return my life.
